HALLELUJAH, EVERYBODY!
WE DID IT! WE SAVED THE PLANET!
NO MORE PLASTIC STRAWS!
NOW WE HAVE PAPER STRAWS…
WRAPPED IN PLASTIC! 👏👏👏
OH, GIVE THESE GENIUSES A NOBEL PRIZE!
The plastic wrapper lasts 400 years, but the straw can't survive three sips of a Dr Pepper!
I ORDERED A…HALLELUJAH, EVERYBODY!
WE DID IT! WE SAVED THE PLANET!
NO MORE PLASTIC STRAWS!
NOW WE HAVE PAPER STRAWS…
WRAPPED IN PLASTIC! 👏👏👏
OH, GIVE THESE GENIUSES A NOBEL PRIZE!
The plastic wrapper lasts 400 years, but the straw can't survive three sips of a Dr Pepper!
I ORDERED A DRINK, NOT A DAMN ARTS AND CRAFTS PROJECT!
By the fourth sip, I'm sucking on a wet toilet paper roll, fighting for my life just to get a little Coca-Cola!
Meanwhile, the cup is plastic, the lid is plastic, the bag is plastic…
BUT THANK GOD WE GOT RID OF THAT DANGEROUS STRAW!
Somewhere in the ocean, a turtle is looking at that plastic wrapper thinking, "Well, what the hell am I supposed to do with this?"
CONGRATULATIONS, HUMANITY!
WE DIDN'T SAVE THE PLANET. WE JUST MADE SURE YOUR STRAW DIES BEFORE YOU FINISH YOUR LUNCH!
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